Are you facing unwanted sexual thoughts or actions? If so, you’re likely feeling isolated, confused, or even defeated at times. Sexual addiction is real and can be overcome with patience and taking the proper steps. Many men and women struggling with sexual addiction experience deep shame and an overwhelming sense of being chained down. While it may feel like you can handle this alone, the truth is that sexual addiction isn’t a challenge that can simply be overcome with willpower alone. Seeking community isn’t calling yourself weak. It’s taking steps of courage towards total freedom. Seeking God and Community is the best approach to overcome any sin struggles you may be experiencing.

Addiction to sexual behaviors, like other addictions, is often fueled by underlying psychological, emotional, and physiological factors. These factors can create bad habits that reinforce the addiction. This makes it nearly impossible to break free from the chains on your own. Attempting to solve this alone may lead to repeated cycles of ups and downs, shame and repentance. You don’t need behavior modification. Instead you need Spiritual Transformation by the renewing of your mind. No better way to achieve this is through Community but more importantly through full surrender to Jesus.

Ephesians 4:22-24

“22 you took off your former way of life, the old man that is corrupted by deceitful desires;

23 you are being renewed in the spirit of your minds;

24 you put on the new man, the one created according to God's [likeness] in righteousness and purity of the truth.”

Let’s be honest. As a human, you will miss up and sin. There is no way around it. But you can do something about it by calling onto Jesus. He is right there patiently waiting for you to believe in Him and to ask for forgiveness. No, Jesus won’t instantly take away the urges to seek sexual images but he will give you someone to rely on when you mess up. He won’t judge you nor will He forsake you. Jesus will comfort you during your time of need and all you have to do is seek forgiveness in Him. After this you will be filled with the Holy Spirit. Your entire thought process will begin to change. These sinful thoughts and actions will start to fade to be less frequent. When your mind starts to wonder back to sinful thoughts you will receive a nudge. A nudge from the Holy Spirit reminding us of how such thoughts brought upon so much pain to yourself and others. If you acknowledge this Jesus will send down so much Love and Grace. Encourage words of affirmation will be felt as your heart is being overfilled by the Holy Spirit.

After receiving this Grace your soul will start to be healed. Your mind will begin to steer towards sexual purity. The sinful thoughts will start to drift away to be a distant memory. When they do rear their ugly head you won’t be defenseless. Jesus will be your tag team partner. The only requirement now is to Pray. Call onto the name of Jesus and ask Him to take away such sinful thoughts. Your mind is a muscle and like any muscle repetitive motion will make it stronger. Each time you say “NO” and call onto Jesus you will get stronger. Your relationship with Jesus will also enhance.

You have taken the first steps towards recovery by confessing your sins to Jesus and asking Him into your heart. Your Sin has been forgiven. You feel confident in your ability to stay pure with Jesus walking beside you. Prayer has become daily ritual. Then out of NOWHERE...BAM!!! Sinful thoughts creep in. Prayer by this time has become automatic when temptation arises. This time after you cry out to Jesus the thoughts are still there. Your human self takes over and you start to feel worthless due to these thoughts. All of your past failures are at the forefront of your mind. Panic rushes in. Your mind is telling you that the only relief is to satisfy your yourself by giving into the sin and lust by seeking sexual content. But then you feel and familiar presence.

He’s loving and reaching out His hands asking you to take it. He calls out “Trust in me and I will take this burden from you. You are forgiven my child”. It’s Jesus. The familiar presence is Jesus. He’s here sending you grace and love. You want to trust Him but you human flesh is holding you back. You don’t feel worthy of such forgiveness for this sin is beyond anything else you done since declare faith in Jesus. Why would Jesus forgive you after turning your back on him time and time again. It’s a back and forth battle between your sin or Jesus for what seems like an eternity. You finally reached your breaking point.

You give in shouting “Jesus, take this pain from me. I fully surrender to your will. You are my Lord and Savior. I need you and only you. Can you please forgive me of my sins” Instantly your pain is nowhere to be found. The Holy Spirit has fully filled your heart. Every part of your being now lives for the Lord. The weight of your sin is no longer your burden to carry. Your sin is now laid down at the feet of Jesus in forgiveness. You are now FREE.

Walking the path of recovery alone will bring nothing but continued failures. Holding onto the secrets and lies is such a burden to bare by yourself. Each lie you tell keeping your sexual sin secret will only lead to more pain. It distances you from God allowing Satan to influence your thoughts and actions leading to a negative mindset. This not only applies God but to everyone you come in contact with as well. Secrets and lies push all goods things away and allows sin to take over. Bad habits are also formed.

Take a step back by becoming vulnerable and opening up to someone you can trust. People in your life will truly understand are willing to help you if you would just ask. Finding the right person to open up to can be a challenge. Pray to God asking him for guidance and wisdom on who to be vulnerable with in confessing your sin.

James 5:16

“Therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person is very powerful in its effect.”

Once you have confessed your sins to another Pray on what they said to you. Ask God if it is His will to follow their instruction. Seek wisdom in God to guide you on the next steps. Find someone with similar struggles. Those of who have walked down the same path can give you encouragement to keep moving forward. No better person to understand your desires than someone who also shares them. This person may have lost hope along their walk and are feeling isolated. You reaching out to them will convey to them that they too are not alone. Both of you share the same sinful desires and can confess to one another. They may have been praying for God to send them someone they can confess to. You may be that very person God sent them.